AUs of our AUs: A timeline diverges, and a would-be queen leaves her kingdom behind.

[deheldegarthe]

Hadand knew he was here. She waited in the throne room, dressed in her family's green rather than the royal crimson, a black sash at her waist. Cama stood by in Shield Arm position, having had both the faith in Hadand and Evred and the air of authority necessary to take over the Guard and back Hadand's orders. When Evred finally reached the throne room, his arrival heralded as much by the people's gasps and murmurs as by any formal announcement, she saluted, fist to heart.

Everything blurred together after that. Evred got her alone at first opportunity, taking Hadand by the hands once they were safely shut into the royal nursery where they had grown up together. "You held the kingdom. There's nothing greater anyone could ask."

It struck her suddenly, how tall and straight he'd grown. Only his expressions distinguished him from his late father. There were new lines around his eyes since last she'd seen him. Even at twenty, he was old enough and wise enough that Hadand could easily trust him with a kingdom. She would trust Evred with anything, herself included. He could never care for her romantically, of course, and she stamped out any faint tendrils of attraction before they could take root and grow strong.

"Sponge--" she started, cutting herself off at use of the childhood nickname. "Evred, I know you have far more than your share of worries right now, but could I ask you to take on one more?" At his nod of assent, an unspoken 'of course' implied in the look that accompanied it, she continued. "There are whispers in the palace. Eyes follow me, and people stop speaking when I enter a room. I've no wish to burden you, but things changed after my father went home to Choread Elgaer. I fear it may mean more trouble coming."

He squeezed her hands briefly before releasing them. "Hadand," and he paused here to consider his words, "you know that I trust you completely, and know you too well to believe any testimony against you." The one bit of broken trust between them had been long-since forgiven, though never forgotten. Evred loved her like a sister. He had always trusted and looked up to her, in a way he never had his own sibling.

"That means there is false testimony," Hadand concluded, as he'd known she would. "Lies to further muddy the waters, as if things weren't bad enough. What do they say?"

Evred's mouth twisted. "You were implicated in my brother's assassination." At her look of outrage, he continued, "I doubt they can get you executed for it, but they will almost certainly have you imprisoned in the numbers they are amassing to back their story.

"Hadand, I want you to go. Like Inda." He never mentioned Inda aloud anymore, but Hadand knew her youngest brother was always in Evred's thoughts. The name alone was proof of his seriousness. "I want you out of reach of this, and there will be no honorable return to Iasca Leror. It is all I can do for you. You deserve to be Hadand-Gunvaer, and hailed as Deheldegarthe by the people. You earned that place. You defended the throne with your own two hands, and I had thought to ask..."

He trails off momentarily, before shaking his head. "Go to Lindeth Harbor. Sail on the ship with least ties to home."

Hadand had remained stoic throughout the speech, but that last word, home, broke her facade. Evred could see how lost she felt now, rather than just surmising it. She knew nothing of space travel. When Barend came home to speak of his time aboard ships, it sounded like nonsense to her. And Iasca Leror was, of course, her home. Hadand could recall no time when she had not known that she would be its queen one day. Her life was here. Her family, what little of it remained to her, was here.

Her family.

With Hadand gone, that would leave not a single one of her parents' children alive and within the kingdom. Her mother would be left with the two girls she'd raised to wed the two sons now lost to her, and not even any letters from a daughter in the royal city as consolation.

That was unacceptable. "If I go," she said quietly, "I need a promise from you. As my friend, my family, and my king."

"Anything," he promised, "if it is within my power to do."

Hadand breathed deep before she spoke again, chin jutting out stubbornly. "Bring my brother home. Swear it to me, and swear it to my mother. Write to my mother from time to time. Tell her I escaped safely. Pass along my love, if you can manage it." She reached out, very lightly touching Evred's arm. Her voice was very soft. "Inda's situation was nothing like mine. He refused a whipping after contrived boyhood dishonor, not because he was afraid but because he did not deserve it. Find a way to set it aside. The revelation of your uncle's other treachery should help. Find Inda, and set things right."

He said he would, and so, she left.

As luck would have it, Hadand found the most foreign ship of all, one whose ties were in an entirely different part of the galaxy. Hadand pled her case with Captain Janeway of the Voyager and was allowed aboard. It pained her to leave Iasca Leror and know that there would truly be no return, but at least now there can be no second guessing.

Hadand can never go home.

She tries to settle into her new life aboard ship, the greenest of new recruits but willing to learn. Hadand cautiously works her way into the crew trying to find a place and a purpose after losing the only ones she'd known.

Comments

[deheldegarthe]

Hadand likes Naomi immediately. She can imagine Tdor at that age taking to the game just as well. It is the sort of game that would work well for her own people, so intent on teaching their children how to fight and defend themselves from an early age. It would be a good, quiet counterpoint to all their more active war games.

She shoots Chakotay a look as he sits back and lets her make the decisions, but she isn't objecting, either. Hadand thoroughly enjoys herself.

When Naomi hugs her, Hadand returns it immediately, not a hint of awkwardness in the gesture. Then she steps back and leans over to kiss the girl on top of the head. "Thank you for teaching me."

She does glance at Chakotay in mild bemusement, either real or feigned. "I haven't any fans."

Because that... is a new bit of slang. She can guess at its meaning if she needs to, but there's no need for political caution here. Easier and more enjoyable to tease him.

[chakotay]

"You're welcome. I'll see you later." Naomi grins brightly at Hadand as she waves and moves off to find her mother. Or most likely Tom and B'Elanna.

Chakotay shakes his head fondly, unable to hide his own smile at the two of them. This was definitely a good idea and he can see them getting along very well in the future. If he's any judge, he'd bet that both Neelix and Samantha Wildman were watching. All the better for them to see Hadand with Naomi if they were.

"Fan," he explains, his smile turning a little more amused. If she's teasing him, he's going to fall for it and still be amused. Just in case she isn't, he'll offer an explanation anyway. "In this context, it means someone who looks up to you. I'd say Naomi really likes you, so she's your new fan."

[deheldegarthe]

"I suspected as much," Hadand admits, grinning and nudging his arm with her shoulder. "We have enough of our own strange slang that I'm not bothered by anyone else's. It is nice being able to ask, though. I couldn't have, at home. Marlovans have reputations as uncultured barbarians, and I was in a position of enough power that I didn't dare show that sort of weakness."

Which is why she tends to pick up nuance so well, and also why she loves not needing to. It's remarkably freeing.

[chakotay]

Chakotay leans over to briefly kiss her temple, heedless of the fact that everyone in the mess could see if they're watching. Things like that no longer seem to matter now that the entire ship knows the state of their relationship.

"You never have to worry about that," he says with a smile. "We much prefer being asked rather than having the wrong assumption be made. I'm sure you can imagine Tuvok's reaction that." The Vulcan wouldn't see the point and would readily make his opinion on that known.

"I don't think they expect us to stay for the entire time, so if we decide to slip away at some point, they'll understand," he continues, smiling almost cheekily down at her. He may or may not be happy to slip away and do something on their own time.

[deheldegarthe]

"Have I said how nice it is not to be a diplomat?" Hadand says to Chakotay, grinning and practically glowing in the aftermath of the public display of affection. Discretion was important, back home. As much as waiting and watching until she was sure of herself.

With a mischievous smile of her own, she asks "Were you hoping to slip away?"

[chakotay]

"Having some time off of being constantly vigilant would be nice," he agrees teasingly, knowing that Hadand's life was far more than something as simple as that. "Sometimes it's easier to leave that to Neelix."

Not necessarily better. Morale officer he was, but perfect diplomat he was not. Especially among the crew.

His smile turns impish. "I might have thought about it. My endurance isn't quite what it used to be."

[deheldegarthe]

She snorts. Given all her time with Neelix, Hadand may have started to like the man, but she will never consider him a diplomat. "I don't think I'd like having no discipline, but it's odd how freeing being a part of someone else's command structure is."

Then he makes his comment, and Hadand grins at the innuendo.

"I'm very sorry to hear that," she teases, "seeing as it interferes with a few of my ideas for this evening."

[chakotay]

Neelix's brand of diplomacy has always been unique. No one else quite does it the way he does. "It's less weight on your shoulders and more spread out," he agrees, thinking back to what she's told him about her life so far. At this point he thinks she deserves a little quiet time and if he can take some of that weight off of her then he definitely will.

She picks up on his wordplay, of course, which makes him smirk in response. "Really? Well, you know what they say. Practice makes perfect. And it builds up strength."

[deheldegarthe]

"That exactly," Hadand agrees, reaching for his hand and squeezing in thanks for the fact that he understands. That alone takes weight off her shoulders. She appreciates it more than she knows how to say, but she'll do her best to show him.

She's fighting hard to keep at least a little composure, managing to contain her anticipation to a sly smile as she assures him, "I think you'll find me a very willing practice partner."

[chakotay]

Chakotay gives a squeeze in return, happy to be there for Hadand as best he can be. And he's glad he understands, at least in theory. He'll never understand what she's been through and how she grew up, but at least he can offer this.

"What do you say we make another round and then go see about getting some of that practice to make perfect?" he asks, grinning cheekily at her.

[deheldegarthe]

"I can't think of anything at all that I'd enjoy more," Hadand assures him, grinning back in a completely open and uncensored way that she very rarely allows herself in public. Her masks have been down around Chakotay for a long time, leaving aside the one hiding the depth of her feelings for him. The rest of the ship, though, still gets some measure of reserve. This may well be the first time some of them see her smile so sincerely.

"I'm very dedicated, whatever I practice." A promise both in the joking way she says it and as an oblique reminder that she isn't going anywhere. She still means everything she said to him last night. Her feelings are every bit as real and solid today.

[chakotay]

"I know," Chakotay responds, his lips twisting in amusement as he offers her a wink. "That's only part of why I love you so much."

The list of reasons on that is rather large by this point and there's no real reason to go into all of them. But he still likes to hint at it and mention his feelings for her as often as possible. It's been a long time since he really had anyone he could love like this.

Despite their difference in height, he reaches for her hand, having given up on trying to hide his smile, and only once they've managed to make one more round of the party-goers does he allow himself to gently pull her out of the mess hall with him. Time to see about that "practice" they'd been mentioning.

[deheldegarthe]

Hadand, stoic warrior princess that she is, unbothered by any and all innuendo, blushes faintly at the public declaration of love. "If I start listing reasons I feel the same, we might never get anywhere. You'll have to be content with the assurance that I do."

"Do you need to stop for anything before we go back to my quarters?" she asks quietly as they escape the mess hall, squeezing his hand.

[chakotay]

Chakotay has to admit that he loves that blush. It’s sweet and makes her all the more beautiful. Not that much of anything could make her less beautiful. He might also be vowing to make it appear as often as possible.

“Just a change of clothes,” he admits. Maybe a bag to carry them in and make it slightly less obvious that he’s staying the night in her quarters, even if everyone on the ship is expecting them to spend the night together by now. Other than that, he doesn’t need much and it doesn’t take him long to get the bag packed. With that done, he continues letting Hadand pull him through to her quarters.

[deheldegarthe]

Hadand has precisely enough restraint to wait until she has Chakotay in her room, the door barely sliding shut behind them, before she pulls him down for a kiss.

"This was the first day I've spent wanting so badly to kiss anyone since I was sixteen." A hormonal teenager who'd just had sex for the first time. Back then, it was only a shortlived infatuation. This is much better.

She grins crookedly at Chakotay. "I hope you don't mind."

[chakotay]

It's a good thing they both have enough restraint or they might be putting on something of a show for the crew members still walking the halls. While their secret relationship might not be secret anymore, Chakotay really doesn't want to give anyone that much fuel for the Gossip Squadron.

A smirk curls his lips at the edges as he lifts a hand to brush his knuckles gently against her cheek. "I think the only thing I mind is that we didn't get to it earlier," he teases warmly before leaning in to kiss her again. There isn't much of a question as to what they'll get up to now, but he also doesn't mind taking their time.

Assuming either one of them can stand it at this point.

[deheldegarthe]

Hadand has always been discreet, even if she does enjoy not having it as a necessity here. Doing a little to limit gossip is fine with her. Particularly since she knows Chakotay is less at ease with it than she is, and in light of the lecture the two of them received.

Taking their time is fine, as long as that time is punctuated by more kissing. After their second kiss, Hadand steps in close, arms tight around Chakotay and head resting on his chest. "We'll just have to make up for the time missed. On that note, do you have any particular requests for tonight?"

[chakotay]

Chakotay has far less practice with it than Hadand does and so far has had less reason to worry about it. The lecture was something of an eye-opener and unfortunately they do still have protocols to uphold, especially since Hadand is officially a part of the crew now. Two officers have more to be mindful of.

As she steps in, he wraps his arms around her, holding her tightly to him. "Anything to make you happy," he replies in what is obviously a very sappy way, for all that it's true. "Is there anything I've missed so far?"

[deheldegarthe]

Men and women are such separate chains of command at home that Hadand, who has no interest in women, has never had that concern before. The integrated structure here took getting used to.

"I am delighted with everything you've done so far," Hadand assures him. "If you're ever lacking for inspiration, I won't turn down massages before we move on to other things. Even if I don't need one particularly badly at the moment."

On the note of things that take getting used to, Hadand hesitates to mention this because of how differently people here seem to treat sex and relationships, but she goes ahead and adds, "I also appreciate hearing specific things you like. I'm careful to be reciprocal and make sure my partner enjoys himself, but any encounters I've had have been paid, in the pleasure houses at home. I don't want to be the center of things all the time."

[chakotay]

They haven't had many talks about things like this just because their relationship is so new. These specific tidbits from Hadand's life are news to Chakotay, but not so much so that he flinches or in any way seems to mind. He might never have done anything like that personally, nor would he ever really consider such, but the Federation does have a pleasure planet called Risa. Even without the problem of payment, he figures it's more or less the same.

"A massage sounds like a good idea," he teases, kissing her cheek before he slips around to her back. "We could get started there and I'll let you know as we go."

He has never been particularly picky, but there are some things he likes that he needs to reclaim from Seska's hands.

[deheldegarthe]

A very small sigh of relief is Hadand's only reaction to Chakotay's lack of one. She hoped for that, but still doesn't know quite what to expect.

Hadand snags Chakotay's hand to kiss it before he can get started on anything, then asks bluntly, "With or without clothes?" Because massages are more thorough without them, but that also might seem to him like jumping into the middle of things.

"I get awful headaches when I'm under too much stress. This undoes them." Hence not needing one right now. She isn't stressed, because she's far too happy about the shift in her relationship with him.

[chakotay]

They do have a few cultural differences as it is. It's hard to tell what each of them might not be used to. So far they have each been willing to accept the other's differences, some of which have been incorporated into their relationship. Chakotay doesn't see that changing anytime soon.

He smiles at the kiss to his hand, leaning over briefly to echo that gesture with a kiss to her cheek. "I'll let you decide," he murmurs against her ear. He certainly wouldn't be against losing clothes, but if there's a way she prefers to go about this, he also won't force her into anything.

She might not be stressed now, but this is definitely information that he will keep in mind for the future. Hadand may find herself more spoiled with each piece of information she gives him. He does, after all, take great pleasure in making her feel good.

"If I get too stressed, I usually try talking to my father or my spirit guide," he offers in return. "Sometimes even that isn't enough. Good food and good company help." He's never really had anyone other than Seska to offer massages or intimacy since he joined the Maquis, as far as he can remember. If Hadand decides to help him reclaim a lot of those memories from Seska's poison, he will not complain.

[deheldegarthe]

"I'm always willing to offer company," Hadand promises, leaning back into him for a moment. Then she steps away and pulls off her shirt in one fluid motion. She glances over a shoulder, eyebrows raised in question. They may be in her quarters, but if he's offering a massage he can lead to wherever he wants her.

"The Odni also helps me. I'm not used to days without hours of physical training. I'm always more centered when I have it." And less out of breath. Fortunately the food on Voyager isn't overly rich.

Chakotay has seen her spar now, for real rather than simply moving through motions without an opponent to challenge her. She has a feeling that seeing her with Inda was a better summary of the world she grew up in than words could produce.

[chakotay]

Chakotay’s smile turns into a smirk, his lips pressing together as he tries not to look too suggestive at that idea. Hadand’s company, intimate or not, is always welcome to him. In fact, she might become as much a stabilizing force for him as he seems to be for her. Their friendship was one of the highlights of his life; now that they have become more than that, he can’t help but want to be around her more often than not. It’s not exactly feasible with their duty schedules, but he intends to enjoy every moment they have together outside of that.

Seeing Hadand with Inda was eye-opening in more ways than one. Her brother gave him an idea of what her life and culture were really like and he hopes they can replicate at least some of it for her. B’Elanna would likely be the best candidate for the Odni, as her half-Klingon culture means she has warrior in her blood, whether she’s fully accepted it or not. And maybe being around someone like Hadand will help her come to understand and accept that part of her that she so dislikes.

Leading her over to the couch, he settles in cross-legged and motions for her to join him. “Have you managed to do much sparring lately?” Inda was one thing, but if he wants to keep Hadand relaxed and happy, he'll do what he needs to. Even if that means twisting B'Elanna's arm to learn the Odni with Hadand. And if B’Elanna decides she’s not interested, there’s always the holodeck. Provided they have the power reserves for it.

[deheldegarthe]

She catches his smirk, and returns it with a grin that promises he can interpret 'company' any way he chooses. Hadand is interested in every interpretation, in his case.

Hadand smiles more softly at Chakotay before kneeling sideways next to him on the couch and draping herself over its arm, head pillowed on one of her own arms.

"Not nearly enough. A little, with a few of the security officers, but that's generally been unarmed." Nothing with her knives. With wry amusement, she adds, "Maybe my spar with Inda will generate some interest in learning. We had enough spectators; I didn't plan on a shipwide demonstration match, but word does tend to spread." As their reception in the mess hall tonight proved.